"Fire one across her bow!!!"

I woke up this morning with a tightness in my chest. Not really a "pain" but a tightness. I didn't think much of it as I got ready for work, and headed in to the office. It didn't get worse, but it did get noticeably noticeable. It would not go away. This lead to worry.
As many know, I was diagnosed with high cholesterol last June. (And in August, the Dr.'s office was kind enough to let me in on the secret.)
So as the day progressed, and the "pain" didn't dissipate, I got increasingly concerned.
I called the Dr.'s office after lunch. I consulted with the Triage Nurse, who then consulted with the Dr. The Nurse came back to say that the Dr. recommended that I go to the ER to be evaluated.

I finished up the work I was working on at the time (at work) and headed to the hospital.
I mention "tightness in the chest" to the lady at reception, and the next thing I know I'm in a wheelchair (sans foot rests) and carted into the triage nurse's office to get EKG'd.

"We're gonna have to shave." she says when I lift up my shirt, "Would you like a smiley face?"
"How about a heart for Valentine's Day?"

She's hooking me up to a dozen wires while I think about the hospital in Idiocracy, and an orderly shoves a thermometer in my mouth. I get moved around and land in a room. My anxiety is high.

The first thing the Nurse does after hooking me up to the Matrix again, and asking the same 20 questions the Triage Nurse does, is hook me up to oxygen. There's something about that oxygen that tells me "Dude. It ain't good."

Then I'm fit for an IV "just in case" and dude pulls 4 bottles of blood out of the connection for the tests.

After a while, I'm carted down to Radiology, and get my chest Xrayed.

Then I'm waiting some more (thanks to the iPod touch and Blackberry for keeping me busy), until finally the Dr comes in.

My Xray looks good. My blood work is back, and it's good. We don't know what the problem is. But they want me to come back tomorrow for a stress test.

The official diagnosis is hyperchoesteremia, which is an abnormal content of cholesterol in my blood cells and plasma.

On my way home, Lenny called to see what I was doing in the ER. (Facebook status updates are your friend).

"I think the Big Guy is sending me a warning. 'Fire one across the bow!'
I better listen before He sinks me."